The friendships between gay men and straight women are famously strong. TV shows have been crafted around the topic and even movies have been made. Think Will & Grace, Stanford & Carrie (Sex and The City), Kurt & Rachel (Glee). But why is this so? What makes gay men and straight women bond so well?
And this video, just because... :)
The bond between the two types is so well known it has its own (controversial) term - the 'faghag'. This term is often seen as offensive, both due to the use of 'fag' to refer to the gay man and 'hag', implying ugly, to refer to the straight female. Perhaps 'fruitfly' is preferably, though still not ideal. The truth is that gay men who are close with straight female friends need not be effeminate in order to bond with them. Similarly, straight females who are close with gay males need not be 'hags' or unable to succeed romantically with straight males. Many very beautiful girls who are or could be swimming in straight male attention choose to spend time with gay men instead.
Of course, not all gay men get along so famously with straight women. But it is a stereotype with some truth behind it. One reason for the incredible bonds that straight females and gay men enjoy may be that both are marginalized in a society that is still generally biased in favor of straight males. Gay men and straight women both suffer similarly from biases and stereotypes about them. Intuitively, there seems to be some truth to this
Science has another answer, though. A study conducted by researchers at Texas Christian University and published in Evolutionary Psychology concluded that the bonds between straight women and gay men may be stronger because the two do not compete for mates. The researchers postulate that since the relationships between the two are free of any "hidden agendas" regarding dating or sex, they are more apt to trust and understand one another. Additionally, the researchers found evidence that gay men and straight women find each other more trustworthy than others when it comes to mating advice. This certainly makes some intuitive sense!
The following video from psychologist Matthew Dempsey provides another viewpoint.
What do you think? If you're a gay man, do you get along with straight women particularly well? If you're a straight woman, do you spend a lot of time with gay men? Why or why not? Let us know in the comments!